10 Good Things

About the "world's most polluted city"

Jan 28, 2025

Hello and happy Tuesday! I’m writing to you from the ~past (wooooooo) because right now I’m on my Tet (Vietnamese Lunar New Year) trip to Laos. You should imagine I’m currently on a magical sunrise hot air balloon ride above Vang Vieng, but realistically I’m probably holding my pee on some vile 14-hour night bus ride.

Sometimes, things just aren’t glamorous. Take for instance Hanoi, which has lately been making news headlines as the most polluted city in the whooolllleeee world. Yum! It’s all we can talk about when we’re inside (how gross it looks outside) and when we’re outside (how we shouldn’t be here, it’s giving us a headache).

Don’t get me wrong, the pollution is rotten, and among the top reasons I’ve been planning my exodus from Hanoi. But sometimes, I become indignant and defensive when it makes the headlines, as if it’s a city only worth international attention when it’s covered in smog. And I swear sometimes it’s not even covered in smog!

One time, when I was in high school, a New York Times reporter came to Duluth to report on a Trump rally and wrote a description of the city so scathing that she ultimately had to apologize. Despite my allegiance with the leftist agenda, I was up in arms with my fellow townspeople. You don’t just come in from the big city and call us “greasy” and our architecture “brutalist.” Have you seen our big beautiful lake?

Anyway, I digress. But all to say that, amidst the unfortunate state of the air in Hanoi right now, publicized to a massive readership, I feel inclined to share some of my favorite things about the city, with you, my little readership. I promise this isn’t the start of me being some kind of “Good News” publication, I’ll go back to whining about my ailments and stuff next time. But for now, here’s 10 Good Things <3

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1. Swan boats

Hanoi has ruined me for other cities for many reasons, but foremost is the unfettered access to affordable swan boat rides. What better way to cruise a lake on a grey day than on birdback? Fast fact: this is also the lake that John McCain famously crash-landed into in 1967.

The swans are supposed to be returned to their little nests (the dock) by nightfall, but I’ve noticed over the years that a few usually stay floating out in the dark, always full of young people looking for a sneaky spot for a tryst outside their parents’ houses. I can’t imagine a sweeter secret hideaway for young lovers (dare I say… “lovebirds”). This is the kind of infrastructure every city should be investing in!

Myself, Oisin, and a bottle of Baileys on Christmas day.

2. Tree coverage

There are just so many old, twisty trees towering over the busy roads, enclosing the steet in a cozy kind of roof. Even with how crowded it is and the fact that there isn’t a single place to park in the old quarter, these gorgeous giants get priority, taking over every sidewalk and canopying everything in green.

3. Rainbow slide

This slide, which is far more terrifying than it looks, is the newest attraction in our neighborhood. I’m mentioning it not just for its own merits, although it has many, but in honor of all the strange and unnecessary attractions in this town. These include:

Parks with those little toy cars that kids can drive around in, while their parents secretly steer them from remote controllers
Personal karaoke booths inside of malls
Loose claw machines everywhere <3

4. Utter lack of snobbery

You would expect that a place that boasts things like rainbow slides would quickly develop an air of snootiness, but not the case! Hanoi is as down-to-earth as it comes, and it makes existing here just so nice.

Any type of dress is appropriate for most occasions. One time, Sean wore jeans to a wedding, and the hosts themselves gave no notice. (I, on the other hand, am still bringing it up years later.) There’s no such thing as being uncouth; you can order an espresso martini with your tacos or a Baileys coffee on a weekday morning from a yoga studio cafe, and not a nose for miles around would turn up at you.

Feet on furniture, loitering in a cafe for hours, stripping down to your bra because it’s too hot— all acceptable. And my personal favorite, when I go to a coffee shop and take out my laptop, no barista is ever going to tell me that I should socialize instead.

5. They inexplicably let me DJ here

This is my stupid way of saying, “They let you try whatever you want here.” Since moving to Hanoi, I’ve been a bad DJ, a rotten dancer, and a truly tragic potter. It’s a place full of talented people, willing to entertain me while I struggle, with no talent, through any number of hobbies. Miraculous

6. Nap normalization

As the self-proclaimed Sleepiest Girl in the World, discovering the prioritization of naps in Vietnamese culture was like being a mermaid on land and discovering a life in the ocean for the first time. Life-changing.

It’s not just that it’s so nice to take a snooze break in the middle of the day (although it is); it’s also that this practice lends itself to a very sweet, casual intimacy in the workplace that I’ve really come to appreciate. Back when I worked in a school, my co-teachers and I would nap together most days. After lunch, we’d do some work in our office until someone invariably looked up with an air of mischief in their eyes. Then, we’d roll out our sleeping mats, take down our hair, and go down for a short nap.

From my perspective, these little midday sleepover parties normalized us to each other, and stripped away some of the unnecessary professionalism that wasn’t even serving us in the workplace. We didn’t have to be best friends to acknowledge that we all deserved a break and that we could take it together; we could do that as coworkers. And so, I also love seeing a Grab driver stretched out on his bike in the shade, or a barista snoozing in their empty cafe. It makes us all feel a little closer.

7. Noise

As I said, I know I’m spoiled as a good sleeper, and that constant street noise wouldn’t be welcome to all. But I truly dread the day I live in a city that goes silent after dinner. If nobody is out but it is too early to be sleeping yet, the implication is that everyone is just existing behind closed doors.

But in Hanoi, the business of life is street-facing. Bars are spilling into the sidewalks, shop owners are smoking on the street, and front doors left ajar are visible through wide-barred gates. On a nighttime walk, I can see what many people are watching on TV, and it makes everything feel so much more welcoming.

I was recently talking with a Vietnamese friend about why Hanoi feels so safe (like, leave your keys in your bike overnight kind of safe). He attributed it in part to how open the city is, which I’d never thought about before. There’s always someone in earshot or eyeline, and it’s hard to feel unsafe with the constant chatter of motorbikes around.

8. Bia hoi

I needn’t say more than “world’s cheapest beer,” but obviously I can’t help myself.

Bia hoi, which translates to “steam beer” and is sometimes called “fresh beer,” is a low-alcohol piss beer consumed in bars (bia hois) that resemble (or I suppose just are) garages full of plastic chairs. It’s exclusively a Hanoi drink and is unequivocally the Best Thing Ever. It’s a beer that fundamentally encourages you to sit for hours on the street, with as many friends as you want, and spend very little money.

It even comes in its own iconic glass, which I recently learned was designed exclusively with this Hanoi drink in mind. They are made out of recycled glass for the express purpose that it’s low-stakes if you break them.

9. No shop talk

This one is more specific to my life in Hanoi. Because expats living in Hanoi are mostly teachers, and many of us in fairly casual jobs, nobody feels the need to chat about work all the time. We aren’t a career-ambitious lot, and it’s lovely.

10. The streets are themed

I am a die-hard proponent of parties having themes. It’s festive and silly, of course, but also it’s pleasing to the eye to see one space jammed with, say, pink, or slumber party clothes, or superhero costumes.

One thing about Hanoi that took a long time for my American-reared brain to wrap itself around was that if you want, for example, a hammer, you can go to “hardware street,” where blocks will be lined with shops that exclusively sell tools.

There’s a street for acquiring pet fish, which looks some kind of traveling aquarium, except that you can wander the stores and compare prices. There’s “plant street,” which I’ll occasionally take a detour just to drive down because of how hilariously whimsical it is. “Kitchen appliance street,” with all its stainless steel contraptions, like a black market for robot body parts. And my personal favorite, “haberdashery street'“ (the internet came up with that name; I didn’t even have to do it), sells feather boas, beads, buttons, and any other frilly trimming a girl could want.

Every drive is a feast for the eyes, and every few roads a theme party. Of course, there’s some kind of economical reason for this retail design, but if you squint your eyes (or simply peer through the late winter smog), it’s almost like it was built just to be wonderful.

Xx,

Ryley

P.S. What’s your favorite thing about your city?

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